9-30 TGIF

"If we are facing in the right direction, all we have to do is keep on walking." - Buddhist Proverb

Back to the Dr. this afternoon for white blood count and check on side effects. Expecting to be neutronpenic again. 

9-28 Eyes on the Prize

Right eye 20/20,  Left eye 20/40.
The visit and all the little tests were interesting. My tear ducts were clogged and he had to flush them out (kind of icky but they used numbing drops so I didn't really feel anything more than a pinch). He also loaded me up with free samples of an expensive  steroid drop I need to use. I'll give ya'll a prescription and supplement  update later this week, those lists keep growing. 
I mentioned the eye tic that's been making me nuts and he did say they can give me a botox injection to make it stop! 
So the tearing is in check for now and I need to keep an eye on it (haha). He told me about the process (surgery) required if the little water ducts close up from the chemo and when he got to the part about making (drilling) a new path through the septum (nose) I kind of blanked out and stopped listening to him. One thing at a time! 
When the tears clear, the swelling goes away and the lashes grow back I can look forward to near perfect vision. 
Here's to looking forward! 

9-27 The Eyes Have It

I have an appointment with an ophthalmologist  this afternoon. I had some problems with my eyes tearing profusely the past few weeks and  thought it was allergies or the smoke in the air from the fires but all the allergy meds I tried didn't work and when I finally checked in with the Oncologist office they told me one of the chemo drugs I am on (Taxotere) often causes eye problems. 
I don't wear glasses and can't recall ever going to an eye Doctor. I'm interested in seeing the test results although they warned me that things may continue to change and I shouldn't invest in eye-wear until a few months post chemo and a follow up visit. 


This chick manages to look sexy and tough at the same time in her goggles 

although I am more likely to look like this:

9-26 Chemo Tongue

Chemo Tongue. It's as icky as it sounds. It starts about two days post treatment (yesterday). My tongue get a whitish coating like thrush. The back of my mouth feels like peach fuzz.

Everything has a metallic taste.  Creamy smooth foods feel good. Cream of wheat and popsicles  and mac and cheese. Two flavors that break through are salt and lemon, apparently they hit a part of the tongue that is still active. I buy lemons in bulk and squeeze them into ice cube trays to freeze then put them in a baggie  in the freezer so I can add them to my water during the day. 

Some chemo patients take this time to eat something they want to remove from their diet...like ice cream or candy. They say after the treatments are over they associate that food with the chemo and never want it again! 

 Happy Fall everyone, it was 105 degrees in Austin yesterday!

9-25 Sunday

Took this photo a few weeks ago under the MoPac bridge at the hike and bike trail near Austin High. 

Slow start this morning.  My fever broke in the middle of the night and I had lots of big colorful dreams.

9-24 The Day After

So this is what I ended up wearing yesterday. And here is a photo of what I look like in the chemo room all hooked up. My meds come in a drip like the saline. I can unplug and walk  over  to the snack area or to go to the bathroom. They have TV and books and magazines and puzzles. Lots of people get benedryl as their first drip and they snooze. They were very efficient this time and maybe my drip was turned up faster because they had me unhooked around 1:30.

 Normally I don't feel anything during the drip or for that evening and since I was out early I was able to go up the street and join my co-workers at our yearly "out of office party"  at Dave and Busters. My office is extremely supportive of all my comings and goings these past few months and I really enjoy their company. 

Icing on the cake, my lovely neighbor D. always checks in with me on chemo night and brings gifts. This time dark chocolate raspberry truffles (even when I have the icky chemo taste I still love chocolate!) and a neat little placard titled "quiet courage" D.  is a Hallmark area mgr and always has the latest collectibles and cards. 

Saturday 

No migraine today and I am so happy! I woke up with the chills around 4:00am, took a bunch of Tylenol and went back to bed till 10:00am. I'm running a low grade fever and I ache head to toe  like if you've ever camped out on a hard rocky surface or maybe taken a wicked boot camp class.  Hoping that will pass later today. 

Our little Texas cool front is making the morning pleasant and I have lots of the new fall shows recorded on the DVR (I treated myself to that gadget a few months ago when I realized I would have a lot of down time at home)

9-23 Round #4 (ding..ding..ding...)

Chemo round #4 and my biggest dilemma of the day is what to wear. Chemo protocol says you should wear a button down top. (Yep, it's in the booklet!) I do have a few button down tops but I prefer soft cotton things against my skin instead of ironed fabrics. They need clear access to the port so I have been wearing a tank or camisole under a shirt. Then you are in a big  recliner for  4-5 hours and scooching around a lot so yoga pants are a nice alternative  to  jeans. I also never know if I will be hot or cold. I used to be a very predictable chilly  when everyone else was warm but lately I've been getting random warm flushes (prelude to hot flashes?) 

I'm bouncing around the house in this tank top but I have another 45 minutes before I have

to leave and I know I will change (at least once).

I've noticed some women in the chemo room come dressed up and coordinated and I'm reminded of "exam" days back in college. My strategy was to dress up for exams when everyone else would roll into class looking like they crawled right out of bed and were still in their PJ's. Psychological advantage? 

And that brings me to this....Well, you know what they say, dress for the job you want, not for the job youhave.

9-18 Moo-tastic

Spent some time downtown this morning chasing  the cows. 

the link:

http://cowparadeaustin.com/

9-17 Austin

Playing tourist in my own city, showing my sis the sights. Hugged a few cows....

9-16 Weekend ready

My sister Leslie came to visit  , we're looking forward to getting out and about this weekend. 

9-14 The Pin says it all

9-13 Tics

So I've had this tic in my left eyelid for about 10 days now and It's really starting to bug me...

Nala cat decided to join in this morning. I'm wearing my new birthday earrings (thanks Mikron!) 

9-12 Cleaning closets

I saw a few minutes of a TV show where they auction off the contents of storage units that are unclaimed. Some trash some treasure.


Found this article interesting but not surprising; apparently our American phenomenon is spreading. 
People are leaving their possessions in self-storage warehouses for longer than ever. But why are people paying to store stuff they rarely use?
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-14718478

What are we all saving and why? 

9-11

Did some cleaning this weekend, finally dawned on my that I no longer needed this in the bathroom. I've had it for years. It's  the quick-vac I used every single morning to clean up the stray hairs. 

Took a short walk this morning. Yoga later this afternoon. 
Had the appointment Friday with the Nutritionist, I'm starting on some more supplements and trying to find creative ways to add them to my daily food. I do not like standing in the kitchen with a glass of water and swallowing 15 pills. My food plan has not changed much, I have to remember to eat more frequently to balance blood sugars, and the three C's: Clean, Complex and Colorful. 

9-9 Today I'm Forty Eight and Great

If you were wondering what to get me.......

I think  my head wardrobe is really lacking a Spock hat!

9-8 Fires and cell counts

The fires are circling around Austin, the closest to my house was Steiner Ranch...about 5 miles away and over a few hills. Bull creek in our neighborhood went bone dry about 8 weeks ago with the drought. Everyone at work is talking  about their "plan" in case they have to evacuate.
This morning I go in for the week-after blood count. Feeling ok. For this apt I get the Physician Assistant Sarah and as usual I have my list of questions. 

Today's headgear: base layer the gray cotton beanie and for visual interest I added the multicolored Buff headband and some dangly earrings. 

9-7 What you see

What you see depends on what you're looking for

Anonymous .

What do you see when you look in the mirror? How often do you look? Have you ever surprised yourself? Wig#2, In the photo's it looks different than what I think it looks like in the mirror. Same could be said for the top I'm wearing, it's pretty unflattering here but in "real time" I think it looks good.

Link to a blogger who is going a year without mirrors!

http://www.ayearwithoutmirrors.com/

  

9-6 How did I ever miss this?

Recipe surfing over the weekend  and found this gem. I'm going to credit it to  those inventive little gluten free vegans who still have a sweet tooth. 
Avocado Mousse, yep, that's right.....AVOCADO MOUSSE!!! I'm posting 2 versions.
#1  Chocolate, dairy free, GF    #2 tangy lime version (with dairy)

Chocolate-Avocado Mousse with Fresh Raspberries

·         2 large ripe avocados

·         1/2 cup organic unsweetened cocoa powder 

·         1/2 cup agave nectar

·         1 1/2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract

·         1 1/2 teaspoons almond extract

·         1/2 pint fresh raspberries, for garnish

Whip it all up in a food processor and let it chill for a few hours.

Tangy lime version (not dairy free)

3 ripe avocados

Juice from 2 medium limes

½ Cup heavy whipping cream

¼ cup sugar

Mix the avocado and lime juice till smooth. Beat the whipping cream with sugar until stiff peaks form. Add the cream 
to the avocado and blend well. Chill for a few hours before serving

9-5 Who knew 90* could feel so cool

Predicted high today of 93* and for all you non-Austinites I can't tell you what a relief  that is for us. It is positively cool outside! Today is free yoga day in Austin (every studio, every class, everyone welcome; no charge) so I decided to spend some time outside and walked down at Town Lake. There is a triathlon in progress but parking was easier than a normal weekend. 

9-4 Skin Deep

Just back from yoga where one of the regular's said hi and mentioned that I looked radiant. We decided it was a toss up between the bright pink bandanna I was wearing or possibly the fact that I am getting a complete body exfoliation (courtesy of chemo)


I can see the advert now......Glowing new skin in just 3 short sessions............more effective than salt scrubs or seaweed wraps...........cells regenerated from the inside out....

9-3 Getting Better Now

One of my favorite Austin  singer songwriters is Bob Schneider. I have lots of his tunes on my shuffle for running and this morning after the fever broke I found myself humming the chorus to this one..... "Getting Better"


(la la la) Oh it's getting better now (la la la)
can almost forget how (la la la) 
it's a big beautiful day (la la la)
and nothing's standing in my way (la la la)
Oh its getting better now (la la la)
can almost forget how (la la la)
bees they all sing her name (la la la)
it never gonna be the same (la la la)


 here's a link where  you can see the whole thing


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90bPdpt0BII

and if you like him here's the link to his bio and latest CD 
http://www.myspace.com/bobschneider

This is a simple cotton and spandex 3 seam beanie from TLC 

It's nice for sleep or a as a base layer with a scarf tied around it for some interest 

http://www.tlcdirect.org/subcategory/dept-28__page-5.html

9-2 Random Acts of Kindness

Writing this after treatment Thursday 


Today  I tried to "bargain" with the Dr. to get less than 6 treatments and I got shot down. Then I acted like a five year old and got upset. 
Ironically they all tell me: "you are tolerating the chemo very well". Like that's some kind of consolation. The pity party lasted about two hours, the drip lasted for five. 

oh, the random kindness. The infusion room was crowded. I guess they were working on one section so instead of spreading us out we were all squished in the first 3 rows of chairs and every chair was taken. If you go regularly the same day for treatment you get to know the people that sit next to you. Today there was a patient celebrating her last treatment and then she went around to her seatmates to visit and gave them each a gift. I didn't know her but she stopped by my chair and introduced herself and asked if she could add me to her prayer list and  she left me a pretty little pink package. So unexpected and so nice and check out my new pink bling!

later at home my neighbor surprised me with a goodie bag. Thanks D. 

Friday morning; Rough night, low grade fever and chills for a few hours. Slow start today. Headed in to work hoping I can get through a few hours. 

9-1 Ready for my close-up

Chemo day round #3. Prepared to quiz the Doc today with some of the research I've been doing. Also meeting with their Nutritionist. 

Today you get a close up. I like how the lipstick makes my teeth look whiter! Now how do I camouflage the under eye circles???

My sister may recognize this pink scarf with sparklies, I "borrowed" it from her about five years ago.